Over the past few weeks, I’ve traveled across the U.S. and Europe, attending back-to-back leadership conferences. These weren’t your average networking events; they were filled with C-suite executives asking difficult questions in a particularly charged moment: What’s next for DEI? How do we adapt and innovate when it comes to AI? How do we steer employees in a politically divided country? On stage, speakers repeated polished points, but to me, the most important part of what these gatherings offered wasn’t the panel talks—it was the smaller, informal meetings taking place, the standing around high-tops, and the walks to the various meals.
In these candid conversations, leaders spoke with a level of candor and vulnerability that there isn’t always room for at the office. Some asked questions, others gave answers. What unified us all was a strong desire for connection, a resolve to make sense of the world together. Today’s leaders are seeing the status quo rapidly dissolve and are looking for support and guidance. As often as not, they’re finding it in one another, not in town halls or board meetings.
At one conference I attended, an impromptu group debate over what it means for a brand to have a literal voice in the age of AI prompted a CMO to leave that session committed to developing a sonic identity for their brand—not because of extensive market research, but because of a single peer-driven conversation. More and more frequently, I see firsthand the necessity for executives to have a trusted community to turn to for advice.
No Longer Just a ‘Nice-To-Have’
Today’s leaders need more than strategy decks. As we face political uncertainty, technological advancements, and cultural shifts, in this landscape, no leader can afford to try to go it alone. Yet, unfortunately, many leaders are, in fact, just that—alone.
I’m no stranger to navigating executive circles, but even after years, walking into rooms with industry leaders can still be intimidating. No matter how confident you are, it still takes genuine vulnerability to approach someone, introduce yourself, and initiate a meaningful conversation. This discomfort isn’t unusual: many executives I’ve spoken to, regardless of their tenure, have expressed feeling awkward or isolated. A recent survey found that over 70% of CEOs experience work-related loneliness, and according to former U.S. Surgeon General Vivek Murthy, feeling lonely at work “reduces task performance, limits creativity, and impairs other aspects of executive function such as reasoning and decision making.”
In a time where clarity and creativity are crucial, building connections is now more necessary than ever. But the reality is, building connections takes work, and it can often be uncomfortable. The benefits are worth it, however, and for lonely or struggling executives, there’s cause to be hopeful. I’ve personally seen how many leaders openly embrace community and look out for one another, and I’ve also seen how quickly things can change for the positive when leaders get themselves into the right rooms. The ability to speak openly, share notes and experiences, and weigh pros and cons with peers before making decisions is a lifeline.
The real value
The true value of these communities is deeper than getting access to prestigious circles or hitting a flashy number of followers or connections on LinkedIn. Rather, they help leaders grow and thrive by providing:
- Space for vulnerability: Real conversations happen away from external pressures to perform. These communities invite leaders to be authentic, honest, and ask the hard questions.
- Shared experiences: A group that can relate to your experiences and open opportunities for growth. Whether you’re looking for new marketing strategies or ways to optimize your product pipeline, it helps to speak with those who get it.
- Fresh perspective: Cross-industry conversations can spark new ideas and remove tunnel vision. A first-time fintech founder might have something to learn from a seasoned executive at a legacy brand, and vice versa.
- Strength in numbers: Community provides the collective courage to act together, especially during difficult moments. You’ll also get the comfort of knowing others around you are also trying to figure things out, and are willing to help you on your journey.
Even though the benefits of community are clear, it can be challenging to know how to find one for yourself. The types of trusting, deep relationships I’m talking about aren’t fostered overnight or over Slack. It takes intentionality to grow your village. If you’re wondering how to begin, I’d start with the below.
Six Ways to Build Peer-to-Peer Connection
- Be curious. Make a concerted effort to learn about others. Ask better questions, listen more deeply, and follow up in a way that shows you paid attention.
- Prioritize depth over breadth. It’s not all about the numbers. Five deep contacts who truly care about you and your success are better than 100 surface-level connections who don’t.
- Attend curated events. Not every conference is worth your time. Carefully select rooms where the guest list and topics align with your interests and where you have the most to contribute.
- Give first, give often. Generosity builds trust, so focus on what you can do for others, not the other way around. From advice to introductions, share whatever’s in your tool kit.
- DIY. It’s not always about receiving an invite. Sometimes, it’s better to send one. Whether it’s a monthly dinner, biweekly Zoom call, or simply a private group chat, consistency is key. Remember: you can always build your own table.
- Lean into vulnerability. You can’t earn trust without taking a risk. Be open and honest, and others will follow.
A Call to Lead Together
Often, leaders only prioritize communities in times of crisis and have to scramble to find the support they need. But the most important relationships aren’t built overnight, and it’s even more difficult to forge them when the pressure is already mounting.
That’s why the time to invest in community is now. Leaders should prioritize building connections just as intentionally as they do other aspects of their work. The future of business will be determined by those who connect and collaborate, and those who have built the trust required to make an emergency call at an odd hour.
If you’re a leader, ask yourself today: Do you have a circle you can turn to when the stakes are high? If not, start creating one now. Start with just one conversation, and keep the momentum from there. Trust is built over time—don’t waste any more of it.